Why do we lose touch with old friends?

While browsing photos on my laptop, i realised how much friends i had made in the last couple of years. From primary school to university days to my prime years until present. But sadly, only a few have remained. Some i consider “acquaintances” or “passerbys” that played a crucial part in my life but never really meant to stay.  I created deep-rooted moments with them and i admit, it cracks my heart seeing them move on in life without me. I don’t know why but keeping in touch with old friends seems to be the hardest thing to do and no matter how hard you try, friendships die.

I collected friends in the past for childish and mediocre reasons. My social circle started to go down the drain when i reached my mid-20’s and grasped what truly matters. I managed to save a few gems but also lost a number of them. Many times i have blamed myself for this, only to realise that the smaller my circle is, the more contented and stress-free i am in life.

I have summed up five good reasons why we eventually lose touch with our old friends.

1. People change. In between juggling family, priorities and goals ,you just simply grew apart so as your friendship and neither of you can be blamed. I know it sucks when “adulting” fades away friendship but it happens.

2. Jealousy. These friends can either be so competitive or insecure that all they want to do in life is outshine you. They try to bring you down and drag your decisions in life making you guilty of things you shouldn’t be guilty, to begin with.

3. Poor foundation. Mates whom you just met a few times that making an effort to see them is seemingly awkward.

4. High maintenance. When “friends” get upset because of unanswered calls/chats/messages and not getting invites to whatever parties you throw or not constantly hearing updates to your whereabouts. One factor could be living in two distant places that sometimes getting together is just so impossible so friendship slowly rottens.

5. Some friendships aren’t worth the effort anymore. While you try your very best to cherish whatever special bond you have, some are just not worth investing anymore. Though you genuinely care for them but the years you spent together is more of like a “fleeting” memory.

In spite these, there are friends who will always remain true to you, who will love you for what you are and not what you have and who will stay with you in whatever circumstances you may have. Friends who will move mountains for you, so as you are to them. Remember, it is better to have one real friend than to have a thousand fold who will just leave you in the end.

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5 thoughts on “Why do we lose touch with old friends?

  1. This is so true! I’ve struggled with the idea that there’s a possibility of losing friends, but that is life. People change and they grow apart. Some are meant to stay with you forever and others are a short part in your life. With all this in mind, I know that everything happens for a reason. We each have a path God is guiding us towards and we have to have faith that things will get better.
    Thank you for this post☺️

    Like

  2. Great post! Sometimes people are right for us at a stage in our lives, but then we change. Your list was perfectly in line with my experiences. The only one I would add is when people like to drink a lot to have fun, since I don’t.

    Like

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